space

space research science astronaut
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

at times i feel that my mind
has grown up faster than my circumstance

~

i don’t want to have outgrown you

i dont want to have come to the end of the page

~

i don’t think we are growing together as much as we are bumping into each other along the turbulent way up to space in a rocketship,
our trajectories together until we break out of the atmosphere

and then, no one really knows

~

i want to explore this wide open space of life

and maybe the only reason i need you is to have a place to come home

a relative to my changes,
a baseline

~

we should be able to get off this ride
when we want to, when it’s over

but i guess it
just
keeps
going

and part of me knows that the journey would be no different
had i started it with someone else by my side.

there is only so long you can stay wrapped up in a person
before the wool falls off your eyes
and your own self demands more from you than they ever could

~

so, this has been fun,
but, i have places i am trying to go

and i don’t think it makes sense for you to try to come along.

you’re on your own journey
and i’m sure we’ll meet up in a space cafe somewhere
to exchange stories and give nods of encouragement
before pushing off again
into our space

averaged

blur calm waters dawn daylight
Photo by Gabriela Palai on Pexels.com

i don’t recognize my life anymore, it’s living itself

there isn’t a place i can rest my head that feels like my home —
maybe that was a concept only for childhood

~

i’m like tempered glass, i can take anything and never break,
but i feel nothing either

~

my highs and my lows have been averaged out
to a near-constant forbearance

~

i don’t know if i’m stronger for keeping it together
or stronger if i’d let myself unravel

~

it makes me happy to make you happy
but i don’t know who i am anymore
or if i should strive to be anyone at all